What's a Date?
by FairFolkBard
Summary: April always swore that I wasn't being a third wheel and mostly, I didn't feel like one; at least I didn't when we were all hanging out as friends. Date nights felt a little different. Reader-Insert 2007 movie.


**This can technically be a reader-insert. I wanted to try it with a different POV. If you guys prefer one way over the other, just tell me and I'll split them 50/50.**

 **Prompt: you're spending yet another "date night" with no date and being an awkward third wheel with your friend and their bf/gf. At the bar/diner/bowling alley/ect that you and your friend and their date are at you meet someone who understands what its like to be the third wheel. when they learn that you have never been on what would qualify as a "good" or "romanic" date they swear to show you what you are missing. the next night, there on your doorstep, waiting to take you to dinner/the movies/frolicking. you can choose to describe the date for extra credit.**

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I huffed to myself for what seemed like the millionth time tonight. Why had I agreed to come?

 _"Probably just for the onion rings."_ I grumbled inwardly as I picked one up from the tray in front of me.

Al's bowling alley was a big but old place. I had been coming here since I was a little kid and so I knew most of the employees. But even the comforting talk with the aforementioned Al could make me forget that I was spending yet another Friday night tagging along on my friends' date.

I couldn't be mad at April and Casey; their relationship surprisingly hadn't gone to shit after they moved in together and they were actually happier than ever. So why the hell was I here?

April always swore that I wasn't being a third wheel and mostly, I didn't feel like one; at least I didn't when we were all hanging out as friends. Date nights felt a little different.

Looking over at the lane we had rented, I confirmed that April and Casey were still laughing at each other's fails, giving congratulatory kisses for each strike, and generally forgetting all about me. Yup, everything was normal.

Normally I would just shrug it off, but tonight I was tired and lonely.

"Well Al, I think I'm gonna turn in early tonight." Despite it actually being close to midnight, I stood up and pulled out a few dollars for my food. Al just held up a hand to stop me.

"It's on the house." He smiled and I shot him a grateful smile before tucking the money away.

After saying my goodbyes to my friends (and after having to convince April that I was leaving because my boss called me into work early tomorrow), I stepped out into the frigid late November air. A chill breeze shocked me straight to the bones, making me shudder and wrap my coat tighter around me.

Luckily, Al's was located in one of the nicer neighborhoods of New York. I didn't mind walking the couple of blocks to my house. I owned a lovely Brownstone down the street. My father left it to me after he passed since I was an only child. While it was rather big for just one person, I preferred my life unfettered by others all the time.

Humming a recent R&B song under my breath, I hopped from one pool of streetlamp light to the next. It was a bit silly, but ever since I was little, I had been wary of the dark.

Not even a second after I thought about that, a sharp _CLANG_ came from the dark alley that I was passing.

Every molecule in my body came to a screeching halt. Nervously, I checked around me for others on the street, but there wasn't a sign of life in a hundred miles.

"Perfect." I groaned.

I was only a few yards from the bowling alley. I could always call for help should I need it. With this in mind, I advanced down the alley, my fear and curiosity battling within me.

Each step was a struggle as I envisioned a crazy hobo attacking me or a giant mutated alligator dragging me away to chomp on my bones in the depths of its lair. Ok, I needed to stop watching crappy scary movies at 3 a.m. My imagination was NOT helping.

For the first few feet, all I could see was a shadowy corner and the dumpster. The alley was that deep, so I was already halfway in. Taking a deep breath, I clicked on my keychain light and pointed it shakily at the corner. All that was there were a few overflowing trashcans. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in.

I spun around, eager to get out of the alley and home to my bed and laptop. Before I could take a single step, a loud thump sounded behind me. Jumping a foot in the air, I screamed and swung my fists wildly around at the air behind me. My fists struck a warm solid surface, not making a single dent and only bruised my own knuckles.

But my fear was unfounded.

"Hamato Raphael, you scared the shit outta me! What are you doing sneaking around here, you jerk?" I pounded on his plastron, despite my sore hands.

"Knock it off, will yah? I'm just patrollin'. And don't call me that; makes me sound 80 years old." Raph cocked his head, unimpressed with my pathetic assault on his person. Well, you can't blame someone for trying.

"Well excuse me, its proper respect for your culture. And don't try and wiggle out of that one, with you're, _'I'm a turtle, I don't have a culture'._ Splinter's DNA was mixed with yours, in case you forgot. So that makes you half turtle, half Japanese." Raph only rolled his eyes. He had heard this argument before. The anthropology student and humanity in me pressed me to respect other cultures.

I was starting to feel more relieved than angry. Even if it was just Raph, at least it hadn't been something else my overactive mind imagined.

"Patrolling eh? Kind of a quiet night for that. And what are you doing in this neighborhood? There are streetlamps and rose bushes on every corner. Not exactly your scene Raph." At this, Raph visibly became a lot less sure of himself. His defensive stance was gone and he couldn't meet my eyes.

"It's not. Not really. I just get worried 'bout Casey and April sometimes. Yah never know what can happen, yah know?" My heart softened slightly; I did understand. Ever since my mom died in an accident and my dad slipped away in the night in an alcohol and drug induced haze, I was protective of my close-knit circle of friends. For many years, this just consisted of April, Casey and the Turtles.

"We should get to higher ground. It's too dangerous down here for you." Raph didn't argue, only followed me up a fire escape ladder. On the roof, the whole block looked even more picturesque and I took a seat on the edge of the building. For a few moments, I admired the view before asking the question poised on the tip of my tongue.

"You had another nightmare. Didn't you?" Again, Raph said nothing, only sat down heavily next to me, one leg pulled up against his chest, the other swinging aimlessly over the edge. I sighed.

"You have to talk to me if you want me to help." He gave a sharp, harsh bark of laughter.

"Who says I want yer help? I'm fine." Oh yeah sure, it wasn't like he was filled to the brim with tension. If so much as a pigeon were to fly too close, I didn't doubt he would make it our next Thanksgiving meal. I really didn't want to be that pigeon.

"Fine. If you won't talk, then I'll assume. My guess is you had another nightmare about Leo being caught by Winter's minions. And now you're feeling like you have to make sure everyone is safe, even if it means staying up to ungodly hours and running yourself into the ground." If his widening eyes and clenched hands didn't give me my answer, his indignant sputtering did.

"W-what? Tha's the stupidest, inaccurate… completely wrong! Ya got it all wrong." I just raised my eyebrows, giving him my own unimpressed look.

"Ugh fine. Maybe fer once… yer right." Now I actually _was_ impressed. Raphael actually admitting his mistakes? There must be pigs doing dive bombs off a skyscraper somewhere.

"I just can't get da image of Leo stuck in tha' tiny cell outta my brain. Hard ta ignore it sometimes; I just go fer a run on da rooftops if it gets too bad." He said softly. I patted his shoulder comfortingly, his hand coming up to grip mine. After a peaceful moment, he let go.

"So. Now I told ya why I'm here. Now why are you here?"

"Bowling of course. Isn't it obvious?" I asked sarcastically. He chuckled; despite our arguments, it was never hard for me to make Raph laugh. He called me 'little forest fire' or 'sprite' since he always managed to bring out my sarcastic, fiery side.

"You can't bowl on da roof, bug brain."

"Not with that attitude, knuckle-head!" Now I had him good and laughing. I knew he'd keep hounding me until I told him; with all the effort I put into bugging the truth out of him, he'd never stop.

"Alright, alright. I was heading home _from_ the bowling alley. Does that satisfy you?" Raph considered my response, and then shook his head.

"Ya came with Casey and April, but yer leavin' without dem. Sup with tha'?" Ok now the game was getting old. I just wanted to get home. I didn't want to have to face the fact that I was so pathetically lonely that I was willing to be a third wheel.

"Oh they're just finishing their date. I didn't want April to worry about walking me home sooo I left early." I shrugged, inwardly praying that he wouldn't find any of that odd or pathetic. My luck didn't hold.

"Ya went with dem on a _date?_ What're ya; their chaperone?" Raph guffawed. Oh my gosh, this was so embarrassing. Since when was Raph perceptive about anything?

"NO. April wanted to go bowling and asked me, and I didn't have anything better to do so-" I broke off midsentence, realizing how loserish I just sounded.

"' _I didn't have anything better to do'?! Why don't I just admit that I'm a social train wreck when it comes to anything to do with dating?"_ I panicked. Who knows, maybe Raph wouldn't understand how dumb it was to be tagging along with my friends on their date rather than finding someone for me.

"No dates for da little spitfire, huh?" Of course he did.

"I'll have you know that I have had plenty of offers lately." I stated, indignantly. It was true but the offers were from the nerdy librarian at the college library. The first had been flattering, but the next 37 were uncomfortable and creepy, not to mention he was seven years younger than me and was barely out of high school. But Raph didn't need to know that.

"Oh yeah? And how many of those have ya accepted?" I blushed; damn he knew me too well.

"Ugh, whatever. It's not like it's nothing to be ashamed of. Dating isn't for everyone, you know."

"Das what people who haven't had a date in years say." He snickered. His laughter faded as he caught sight of the uncomfortable look on my face. I could never hide my emotions well.

"No way. Ya serious? I woulda thought that someone like you… er, I mean-" He broke off, now also awkward. My own embarrassment was fading.

"Someone like me? Now why does that sound like an insult?" I teased, happy to no longer be of the defense and now be on the offense.

"It's not! It's just surprising, is all." He finished, rubbing the back of his neck. I rolled my eyes. Might as well get it over with; he was going to laugh anyway.

"If you must know, I haven't been on what I consider a proper date ever. That doesn't mean I do it on purpose; there's just never anyone who I'm willing to go on more than one date with. It happens." There, now he knew I was a picky dater.

I'd heard the usual over the years. _You'll find somebody someday! Oh, you just play hard to get, don't you? If you just gave him a chance, he's so nice!_ Yeah, well I wasn't looking for a nice somebody. I wanted somebody who wouldn't bore me to tears and try to make me laugh with a weak pun.

"Now, if I ever found someone who actually took me on a date that wasn't just plain old dinner and a movie, someone who actually _tried_ harder to be romantic than just a single compliment at the beginning of the night or someone who doesn't try to order my food for me…" Oh boy, that always irritated me. One date and you think you know what I like?

"Heh, always knew you were complicated babe, but jeez." Raph commented.

"I'm not complicated just because I know what I like and don't like ok?" Why was I telling him? He didn't even know what a date was. I winced inwardly. Ok, that was pretty mean; Raph was just trying to help and listen to my problem.

"Oh no, it's fine, I'm just glad that now I know what and what not ta do." What? What did that mean? Before I could contemplate his intentions further, he stood, cutting an intimidating shadowy figure against the backdrop of the city.

"So how 'bout it, princess? Will ya go on a date with me and let me show ya what yer missing?" He held out a hand to me. I stared at it dumbfounded. He was… asking me out? So _that_ was why he got me talking about my dating life. I should have recognized I was being corralled. But oddly, I didn't mind so much. Raph had been quite honest with me and never actually made me feel bad about my personal life or lack thereof.

And even more surprising was how inviting the offer was. Raph was a great guy, never without a quick response and actually friendly when you got to know him. And since I had known him for years, it would be like skipping all the awkward first date questions and just focusing on each other.

I realized that Raph was still waiting. His confidence had visibly wavered and he was on the verge of lowering his hand. His sudden humbleness helped me make up my mind andI reached up to take his hand.

"Only if you would wanna date someone like me." I grinned. His slow, easy smile that reached all the way to his eyes was all the response I needed.

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 **Soooo what did ya think? I'm thinking I can do the date as chapter 2. Up to you guys, tell me what you think in a review!**


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